Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
