Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
