And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
