office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
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