omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize