like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
