allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
The uberlube is also flammable
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
