I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
