This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
