Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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