We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
They are going to name an STD after you.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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