Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
