im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Randomize
