Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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