do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
