It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
foreskin is a definite game changer
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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