so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I'm too high and old for this...
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize