How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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