Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
