It's just like the Real World with babies
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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