Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
