He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
