I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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