You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
