he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
