i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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