she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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