The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize