were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
