Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
