ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
