After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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