sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
