SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
3pm strippers are depressing
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
