Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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