I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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