Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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