i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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