yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
