Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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