Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
