I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
