WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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