nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
