I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
vagina is talking i cant
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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