I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
