Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
I love us.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea