My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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