Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
