He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize