Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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